Some things we have a choice in, and that means “control,” at least on the physical plane. Other things sweep us up, and we can only marvel at being part of the process: the spinning solar system, the spinning globe—and now the permanently altered environment which envelops us.
Since we’re driven to form bonds, we need to understand how Nature intended us to bond. Until we successfully learn how to couple, how can we follow the example of cells to create larger cooperative communities? Until we successfully learn how to couple better, the next stage of our evolution, wherein humans assemble to form the larger superorganism humanity, is stalled.
I don't like the idea of soul-mates. It suggests the wish-fulfillment
of a pre-destined fixed-deck, which reduces you to a hapless rube at the
card table of love. If your heart is open, if your
curiosity is great, if your enthusiasm for life abounds, potential
soul-mates will keep skipping toward you out of the mist.