The following is excerpted from The Toad of Dawn by Dr. Octavio Rettig Hinojosa, published by Divine Arts.
In his book DMT: The Spirit Molecule, psychiatrist Dr. Rick Strassman wrote about the first study of hallucinogens in the United States more than twenty years ago, in which he administered forty intravenous doses to sixty volunteers over a time period of five years. Many of these volunteers reported experiencing similar effects. Strassman’s work confirmed that there is no longer any reason to prohibit the study of these substances as there is no data indicating toxicity in the subjects studied, no indication of undesirable or permanent side effects. In every case, the duration of the effects was similar and the individuals reacted in similar ways to the dosage. I believe it is important to conduct similar studies with the Otac nectar, which, despite belonging to the same group of substances called tryptamines, is differentiated by a molecule more commonly found in preparations with DMT (it is the N in N-DMT).
Despite its different effects, I find greater therapeutic value in the secretion of the Sonora toad than in any other entheogen compound, due to its short duration and its incredible potential. These qualities make it my number one candidate for biopsychosocial medicine, as a change promoter, and for improving the quality of life.
Otac is the transducer between reality and fantasy, and creates a hybrid state in which both may manifest together. It is a direct path to the most extraordinary and unbelievable states that could ever be produced in the human being. In my particular case, it was truly incredible to breathe in the vapor produced by the nectar of the Otac. It opened the door for me to understand who I am, who we all are, where I come from, and where we are going. It gave me the opportunity to consciously choose my destiny, to value what this game called life is about. And, as unbelievable as it may seem, this is reality. I have lived it and shared it with many people. Close to eight thousand sessions have been given in various countries of the world. I’ve found that people in all parts of the world think the same way. It is not just me. It is the toad. It is the substance. It is the expanded state gifted to anyone who wants to open his or her heart and mind to the change that can happen through this divine energy. It is a well-deserved gift. I have dedicated nine years of my life to studying, diffusing, and experimenting with the proper- ties of Bufo alvarius. My only aim is to do what is right. I know how good it feels to do what one can, what one must, what one thinks is best on the broadest level.
Otac is a teacher medicine. It allows you to have a dialogue with yourself, helping you to see yourself from many different angles, which reveals so much intelligence and knowledge inside us. It provides a way to look at yourself clearly. It teaches us how to breathe consciously, how to find inner peace, joy and happiness, and how to be patient.
At the beginning, my experiences in the extracorporeal plane, astral trips, and deep meditation seemed sporadic, random things. Complete magic. Some were beautiful, others dark. I remember feeling as though I had been launched into space, extracted from my body while my mind and ego appeared to dissolve. The perception of my being and of reality completely vanished. There was whiteness, light, peace. And in this immense emptiness where nothing existed, I recognized the feeling of being home. Going home was indescribable; there was order and balance. There was no positive or negative, no evil; there was no moral judgment or right and wrong. All was well because every- thing had already happened.
The experience of living seen through the lens of Otac has allowed me to see things with greater clarity. I have known a complete “love of creation.” When I see myself reflected in the All, I feel included in something far greater than this game of “me” and my ego. I realize that I am absolute.
In a now distant past, I once lived under the shadow of injustice. Greed, deceit, and violence dominated everything, and everything was the same. Suffering was seen as something normal and was even a path to salvation and knowing. “No pain, no gain.” Chaos and disorder were normal parts of life. Misinformation, terrible influences, and general ignorance governed my world. I even thought that was how it had to be. Distant are the days when I wandered aimlessly, lost in the immensity of my solitude and injustice. Then everything changed and I realized how great was my heart. There was a mysterious hand at work in my life. I had spent my life looking for understanding elsewhere: in books, the outside world, in space. Now I began looking for more of myself, and for what may be called God. I searched in heaven, in church, in the figures of saints and preachers and religion, in dogma and doctrine. I looked and looked, and all I did was fill my head with dates and facts, name and events, history, geography, art, science fiction, and so on. I found no answers, just questions. I looked everywhere, and the result was the same.
But twelve years ago on the beaches of Maruata in Michoacan, mixing mescaline and Salvinorin A in high doses, I lived an event that proposed a perfect solution. Since then I have acknowledged that there is indeed a higher power. We all come from the same place and will go back to it. Existence is without a doubt a beautiful gift. I had underappreciated it when I thought life was some random occurrence that had happened “just because.”
Now I knew that “it” was everywhere and that it had always existed. I just hadn’t seen it. I saw that “it” lived and swam in all the cells of my body, in the cells of everybody including those life-forms without cells. We are all part of a grand living organism.
Nothing I did in my life even remotely reached the level I attained with psychoactive plants; not graduating from school, or my first sexual experience, nor any of the toys I bought along the way, compared to what I eventually discovered. With time and patience, I have attained the wisdom needed to reach my goals. Nothing has filled me with so much satisfaction as the gifts received from Bufo alvarius. Neither ayahuasca, nor peyote, mushrooms, LSD, nor cannabis has the therapeutic benefits that I have found in that profoundly generous toad.
As a scientist, I say clearly that this extraordinary being has in its body the strongest healing medicine I have ever known. I have seen how the vapor of the Otac medicine cures chronic bronchitis, strengthens the immune system, helps treat addiction, and heals the organism. It cures depression. I have seen with my own eyes how people have changed their lives after just one experience with the material offered by the toad’s glands. Every day more people benefit from its properties. The effects are instantaneous and positive in the short-, medium- and long-term. I feel blessed and privileged. I see this as the most precious gift I could possibly have received.