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This story is excerpted from the new novel, The Drop Edge of Yonder, and is reprinted with permission of the publisher, Two Dollar Radio.

 

HATCHET
JACK AND ZEBULON RODE NORTH ACROSS THE high desert towards the Spanish Peaks of the Sangre de
Cristo Mountains. Two days later they reached the cabin, a hard little stand at
the end of a steep valley, quilted halfway to the roof with drifting snow.

Nothing much had changed. The cabin's roof still had
most of its shakes blown off, the makeshift corral hosted three starving mules,
and a curl of smoke drifted up from the chimney like a lonely question mark.
After they walked their horses over the ice-covered river that snaked in front
of the cabin, Zebulon hollered a long "Hallooo." When there was no answer, they
secured their horses inside the sagging corral and pushed through the stiff
door of buffalo hide.

An ancient stern-faced woman sat behind a three-plank
table in patched red long johns, pointing a shotgun straight at them. In front
of her a torn deck of cards was spread across the table for a game of
solitaire. Brown streaks of tobacco juice ran down her chin, and a thin curtain
of gray hair fell over one side of her ravaged face.

"I thought it was your Pa come back," she said to
Zebulon. "I was lookin' forward to smokin' the old grizzle-heel straight to
hell."

She looked him over top to bottom. "A bit off your
graze, ain't you, son? Last I heard you was hangin' out with flatlanders and gold-suckin' Argonauts."

"I was, Ma," Zebulon said.
"No more."

"You sure are a sorry piece
of used up sod," she went on. "You look like a damn ghost. Beat-up and thinner'n
a snake on stilts."

"I'm comin' around," he
reassured her.

"You might be comin', but
you ain't yet around."

"Howdy, Ma," Hatchet Jack
interrupted.

"Howdy yourself," she
replied, spitting a thick stream of tobacco juice in the general direction of a
copper spittoon. "And don't Ma me. Use my Christian name or put your
scrawny half-breed ass back on the trail."

"All right, Annie May."
Hatchet Jack picked up a bottle of whiskey from the table and took a long pull,
then handed the bottle to Zebulon.

"You got some big fat cojones
comin' back here," Annie May continued. "Last I heard you was down on the Brazos rollin'
steers and makin' mischief."

"No future in steers these
days," Hatchet Jack said.

"I'll vouch for that,"
Zebulon said, pulling off his bloody shirt and dropping it on the dirt floor.

"I'll just bet," Annie May
said, shooting him a weary glance. "Vouchin' bein' a particular specialty of
yours. That and poochin' stray women."

She turned her head towards
Hatchet Jack. "What brings you here?"

"I need to get square with
Pa," Hatchet Jack said. "I mean, Elijah. Finish my account with him."

"You gone to Jesus, or just
loco?" the old woman asked.

"He's become a healer,"
Zebulon explained.

Annie May cackled, slapping
her arthritic knees with her palms. "Well don't the sun just shine. You're too
late, Mister Healer-Dealer. He took his sorry ass to Californie. Who knows where?
Now you got me to deal with.

"It ain't the same."

"The hell it ain't. The
horse and traps you stole were mine the same as his. By rights I should plug
you for thievery and be done with you."

Hatchet Jack shrugged.
"That's up to you. I still got a horse to give back, even if I lost the traps."

"We'll eat," she said
firmly. "Then speculate."

She sighed, shifting her
gaze to Zebulon, who was slicing up a pair of his Pa's pants with his bowie
knife.

"To think you're all I
spawned," she said. "All that I care to recollect anyways."

She picked up the bottle of
whiskey, studying his bloody chest. "What happened to your pump?"

"I guess I been shot."

"You guess?" She hobbled
over to him and poured the rest of the whiskey on his chest, an act that made
him howl more from witnessing the last of the bottle than from the acute pain.
He shuddered as she carefully wrapped a strip of pant leg around his chest.

"How come there ain't no
bullet hole?" she asked.

"I wondered about that," he
said.

"Might be the slug passed
through you. Who done it?"

"Most likely a pecker-head
sneakin' a card off the bottom." He nodded at Hatchet Jack. "That's what he
says, anyway."

"You was there?" she asked
Hatchet Jack.

"I come in after the show
was over," Hatchet Jack said.

Satisfied with her nursing
skills, Annie May stood up. "Don't neither of you burden me with your sad
stories," she cautioned. "Or what you done or ain't done or what you're goin'
to do. I'm too old for that bullshit."

She took down a tin of
biscuits and a slab of jerky from a sagging shelf. After she dropped the food
on the table, she sat down, lit up a curved ivory pipe, and watched Hatchet Jack
and Zebulon eat.

"Raise many pelts this
winter?" Hatchet Jack asked, chewing hard on the jerky.

Annie May shrugged, then
let loose another streak of tobacco juice, missing the spittoon by a foot. "I
floated my share of sticks, but the haul was damn thin. Not much beaver, a few
muskrats and otter, the odd fox. Hardly worth the trouble. Far as I'm
concerned, the mountains be finished. Leastways for this old sow."

They passed around a second
bottle of whiskey. When the bottle was empty, Hatchet Jack and Zebulon lay down
on a pile of pelts, too tired to pay attention to the rats sniffing across the
floor for crumbs.

Annie May closed her eyes
and continued to smoke, enjoying the smell and presence of two snoring men.
When the memories of a newborn son and a mountain lover who wouldn't quit
threatened to overwhelm her, she stumbled off to her own bunk in an add-to
behind the stove.

~ ~ ~

The next morning Zebulon
cleaned out a weasel nest underneath a rafter while Annie May sat by the
window, watching Hatchet Jack sort out her meager display of pelts, then cinch
and slap them over the backs of two emaciated mules.

"Never thought I'd see both
of you at the same trough again," she said. "Not after what Hatchet pulled with
your Pa. Not to mention your Pa with him."

"He's askin' forgiveness,
Ma. That ain't easy."

"Forgiveness ain't in my
possibles bag. If your Pa was here, he'd give him a taste of forgiveness upside
the head."

Zebulon opened the door and
threw out the weasel nest, looking at Hatchet Jack who was kneeling on the
ground, carefully shoeing one of the mules.

"Hatchet's pulled me out of
a few scraps and shoot-outs," he said. "I owe him for that."

Annie May shrugged. "You
always were a sucker for idiot kindness. Truth is, your heart slammed shut when
Pa brought Hatchet back and he tried to drown you in the river. I had to pull
you out by your hair. Ever since then, you'll take any bone thrown to you."

She sighed, not remembering
how much Zebulon had been told about Hatchet Jack.

"I'll tell you some things
Hatchet picked up from your Pa," she said. "Dealin' off the bottom of the deck.
Settin' someone up and draggin' him to hell and then tellin' him he done the
opposite. For spite and pleasure."

"He's slick all right,"
Zebulon acknowledged. "I'll give him that."

"Never mind," she went on,
as if she was having second thoughts. "He's still kin. I raised him almost the
same as you, a fact that calls for some measurement, if not in the eyes of the
Lord, then from you and me. Poor lost-and-found half-breed bastard."

She took a deep breath
before she finally said what was really on her mind: "Tell you one last thing,
son. After I sell my pelts, that's it for me. I ain't about to wait for my last
days stretched out in a low-rent room over some dumb flatlander's store."

"Maybe I should pack you
down to old Mex," Zebulon suggested. "Let the sun warm your bones. Fix you up
in some little hacienda with a front porch and a cantina down the
street. There are worse ways."

"What the hell would I do
in old Mex? Chew my sorry cud with all them bean and chili-eaters? Nossir. When
I take my carcass to the misty beyond, the sky will be my blanket and I'll have
a mountain to lean against and a jug to pull on. That'll be enough."

He had grown up hearing
this statement, or at least variations of it, and depending on her mood he
always gave the same reply:

"You brought me into the
world, Ma. I'll see you out."

This time she interrupted
him: "I didn't raise you for false sentiments, son. You do what's in front of
you and I'll do the same."

 

THE
FOLLOWING MORNING THEY ALL RODE OFF INTO A SOFT spring rain. They took their time, as Annie May was in
no hurry to be shut of the only place she had known for thirty years, a place
she was beginning to realize she would never see again.

That night they camped among the crumbling ruins of an
abandoned pueblo, the wind howling around their fire like a chorus of
grieving widows. Halfway through a meal of Annie May's remaining biscuits and
dried jerky, Hatchet Jack stood up, his head swiveling back and forth.

An ancient Mexican stood in the shadows, his nearly
toothless face marked by an empty eye socket. His skeletal frame was wrapped in
torn leggings and a long white cotton shirt.

"You leave a trail like a wounded buffalo," the
Mexican said with a soft Spanish accent.

"Plaxico!" Hatchet Jack exclaimed. "How did you find
me?"

"I didn't find you. You found me."

"But -"

"Your problem is that you think too much. And not
enough."

Without another word, he turned and disappeared.

Spooked by the old Mexican's ghostly appearance, Annie
May paced back and forth, raising her arms against the elements: "Hurrah fer
mountain doin's and all the old warriors in all the times! My boys and I, we come in
peace and we'll leave in peace and we'd be grateful if all you dead and dyin'
red niggers and bean-eaters put the stopper on your salutes. One day soon I'll
pitch my tent inside the big circle. But not now. Not this night."

Zebulon and Hatchet Jack
joined her, shuffling their feet around the fire, faster and faster as they
hollered their mountain yells: "Waaaaaaaaagh…! Waaaaaaaaagh…! Waaaaaaaaagh!"

Collapsing on their backs,
they finished the last of the whiskey as they sang an old family song:

Old Long Hatcher gone under on the north
Platte
,

Found him a bar but the bar laid him flat.

Hatchet Jack reached into
his pocket and removed a paper bag full of penny candies. Popping half of them
into his mouth, he threw the bag to Zebulon, who took a fistful and passed the
bag to Annie May, who gobbled up the rest.

"We're markin' the bush on
sacred ground," Hatchet Jack said. "Plaxico might make us pay for that."

Annie May sighed. "You seen
one old buzzard around these hide-outs, you seen 'em all. The hell with him.
I'll settle for a healing. What about it, Mister Healer-Dealer? Can you strut
your healin' stuff? Got me a bad knee, shoulder ain't right, arrowhead been
stuck in my leg for ten years, teeth gone or rotten, sluice line to my gut
plugged up. Not only that, but I'm spiteful with bad notions."

"I can handle that," Hatchet
Jack said, showing no confidence at all.

"Check out Zeb while you're
at it," Annie May suggested. "He's tough to figure, shot up with no bullet in
his pump. Like he don't know if he's here or down under."

Hatchet Jack shook his
head, not wanting to go ahead with any of it. "I never done two straight up. I
always been the helper."

"Yoke us up anyway,"
Zebulon said. "Never mind the windy complaints."

Hatchet Jack poked their
shoulders and cheeks with his forefinger, blowing tobacco smoke over their heads
and shoulders and into their faces. Then he stood up and opened his arms to
include the night sky and the black clouds drifting beneath a quarter-moon like
a procession of giant bones.

"Old Father," he cried out,
"don't contrary me now!"

Arching his neck and head,
he shut his eyes and sank to his knees, pounding his fists on the earth.

The wind stopped as if
turned off by a spigot.

Annie May shook her head in
wonder. "I'll be stripped naked and fried in goose grease. Maybe the boy ain't
such a lyin' shuck after all."

As the wind rose again,
Hatchet Jack disappeared into the darkness. Just when they thought he had run
out on them, he returned.

"Plaxico says it's all
right to join him."

They followed Hatchet Jack
down a steep path, descending a series of narrow, winding steps that led to a
stone platform lit by a fire and a single torch set into a cliff. Beyond the
platform, a deep canyon separated two mountains shaped like pendulous breasts.

Plaxico sat cross-legged on
one side of a large circle made from white flour mixed with corn shuckings and
colored stone beads. Above him on the crumbling walls, mounted warriors threw
lances at running mountain lions and antelopes.

Hatchet Jack motioned for
Zebulon and Annie May to sit opposite Plaxico, then took a position at the
lower end of the circle, behind an altar of flat stones. On one side of the
altar, a statue of the Virgin Mary had been placed next to an eagle feather and
a brightly colored Kachina doll. On the darker side, the skeleton of a rattlesnake
circled a human skull. A dozen tomahawks, as well as swords and hunting knives,
were stuck in the ground in front of the altar.

Hatchet
Jack stood up. "This medicine is from old Mex. It raises the dead and then some. It
has the power to cozy up to the underworld of the snake, the middle world of
the mountain lion, and the higher world of the eagle. I never tried it, but
that's what I been told. So here goes."

Plaxico sat behind the
altar pounding a flat drum and chanting an incomprehensible prayer. He broke
off a few times to yell instructions in Spanish to Hatchet Jack, who motioned
for Annie May and Zebulon to stand at the top of the circle. Then he approached
them holding a hollowed-out gourd in both hands.

Hatchet Jack drank, then
offered the gourd to Zebulon, who drank and passed it to Annie May. After she
drank, she handed the gourd to Hatchet Jack, who handed it to Plaxico, who
finished what was left. After a consultation with Plaxico, Hatchet Jack pulled
a long curved sword out of the earth and rushed straight at mother and son,
yelling and dancing around them as he slashed the sword above their heads.

Annie May and Zebulon stood
as if their feet had been nailed to the ground as Hatchet Jack replaced the
sword in front of the altar and collapsed by the fire. Behind him, Plaxico
swayed from side to side, shuffling around the circle, moaning and shaking his
rattle.

The medicine roared through
their bodies in noxious waves until they sank down on all fours, vomiting and
heaving until nothing was left inside them. They stayed that way until the
first light of dawn shuddered over the horizon. As the mountains grew bolder
and more defined, Annie May cried out at a long parade of skywalkers moving
towards them over the snowy peaks. Some were conquistadors and mountain
men, others Hopis, Navajos, Zunis, and Apaches. All of them were raising their
arms to greet the rising sun. Behind them, bringing up the rear was Annie May's
long-dead brother. He was followed by her mother and father and then the
preacher of her youth, who used to terrify her with fiery sermons on sin and
repentance, and who now seemed, as he looked over the valley, sad and confused.
The sky shifted and the parade dissolved as she saw an image of herself as a
young girl standing in the middle of a field of tall, wavy grass, a bonnet
pulled over her head, her bare feet planted on the black earth, crying out in
fear as an eagle glided towards her in slowly decreasing circles. Her mother
watched from the door of their homestead as the eagle gently lifted her up in
its talons and flew her across the grassy plains into the foothills and
mountains beyond. Fragments of her life appeared one after the other: her first
shoes; her marriage bed; the long white beard of her father as he stood behind
the mule on the last furrow of a plowed field; her husband, Elijah, whirling
her around a dance floor, then carrying her on his shoulders through the door
of the cabin he had built for her; and there was baby Zebulon crawling over the
dirt floor. She wept and wept, haunted by the memories and the approaching
shadow of her own death.

"Are we dead?" she cried.
"Or does it just seem that way?"

Zebulon cradled her frail,
broken body in his arms as Hatchet Jack, seized with his own visions and
oblivious to her racking sobs and sudden peals of laughter, smacked the earth
with his palms. "Who are my real Ma and Pa," he howled, "and why have they
forsaken me?"

The only answer was the
howling wind.

"Can you see the truth of
it, boys?" Annie May shouted. "Life and death. The eagle and the washing up and
the outhouse. The stove and the snow. The horse and the mountains and the 'baca
juice. No doubt about it. The whole stew is only a passing, you and me and all
the rest. The goddamn joke is on us, boys!"

Zebulon
made his way to the edge of the platform. In front of him the mountains were
undulating like three copulating snakes. He wept at the energies threatening to
consume him, motherly and loving, violent and terrifying, a warm hissing breeze
that flowed through the strangled knots of his being. He knew what he had
always known and had always forgotten: that he was composed of the same elements as the plants and
animals and the rain, which was now spreading in thick sheets across the deep
valley, followed by the sun and then a rumble of earthshaking thunder that
suddenly transformed into the roar of a mountain lion. He was part of it all, a
drop of water in the ocean, a crushed wild flower under the heel of an outlaw's
boot, a sun-baked skeleton in the desert.

When Hatchet Jack loomed up
in front of him, the vision dissolved into a vaporous fog.

For the rest of the night,
mother and son slept in each other's arms, each comforted by the other's
breathing. When they woke they were alone and the sun was shining directly
above them as if through a huge prism.

Behind them, the altar was
gone and the circle erased, as if none of it had ever existed.

Empty of thought or any
emotion, they climbed up through the ruins until they found Hatchet Jack
packing his horse. Plaxico sat against a crumbling wall, rolling a cigarette.

"I'm pullin' out." Hatchet
Jack's hands shook as he swung into the saddle. "Some of the medicine worked
and some went south." He looked at Plaxico, then at Annie May. "The spirits
told me it wouldn't be a good idea to give you the horse."

"Who cares about any of
it?" Annie May said softly. "It's all the same, horse or no horse."

They watched Hatchet Jack
gallop off without a wave or a look back, as if pursued by a confusion of
unknown mysteries.

"He talked to some of the
spirits all right," Plaxico said. "But he choked on the rest. Too big a meal
for a beginner."

And then he, too, was gone,
disappearing back inside the pueblo.

 

ANNIE MAY
AND ZEBULON SMELLED BROKEN ELBOW BEFORE they saw it. What had been a trading post and a few
shacks only a year ago was now a long, rutted street dominated by pandemonium
and open sewage. Drunken miners shouted back and forth in a dozen languages, a
naked Chinaman crawled past them into an alleyway pursued by a screaming whore,
half-dead oxen pulled overloaded supply wagons through mud and melting snow,
past signs advertising wares at outrageous prices: Boots $30, Flour $35,
Blankets $30, Washing $20. Every square foot of ground that was not lived on
was cluttered with mining equipment, dead dogs, pigs rooting in piles of
stinking garbage, wagon beds, spare wheels, barrels, and stacks of lumber, as
well as makeshift corrals where mules and horses stood knee-deep in muck.
Further away, on the banks of a swiftly moving river, hundreds of high-booted
men — most of them Indians, Mexicans, and Chinese — squatted beside cradle-like
gold washers and sluice boxes while others worked up a canyon in steep pits,
hacking at the soil with picks and shovels.

At the end of the street, they reined up in front of a
two-story trading post.

Inside the cavernous room, clerks ran back and forth
filling orders in Spanish, French, and English for rifles, canned goods,
farming equipment, wagon beds, and sacks of feed. A few of the older clerks
waved to Annie May as she approached a plump young man perched at a high-top
desk, adding up small sums inside a huge ledger.

Annie May pulled herself up
to her full height, which was barely up to the level of the desk.

"I'm Annie May Shook, and
I'm here to sell my pelts."

The clerk nodded, not
looking up as he took off his glasses and rubbed his strained red-rimmed eyes.

Annie May rapped on the
desk with the barrel of her shotgun. "I want both ears when I'm talkin',
Mister. Where be the major?"

The clerk took his time placing
his glasses over his nose. "Major Poultry sold out last winter. You'll deal
with me now."

"Always was partial to the
major," Annie May said. "Dealt with mountain folk straight up."

"Business is business," the
clerk said with measured patience. "Whoever be the buyer or seller."

Annie May scratched her
head, took out her pipe, began to light it, then shoved it back inside her
buffalo robe. "All right, then. What be the price of pelts?"

The clerk looked down at
Annie May as if her presence was an annoying fly. "The bottom has fallen out of
the fur market. It will never come back. That said, I'll give you fifty cents a
pelt. Take it or leave it."

She stared up at him,
unable to comprehend. "The hell you say."

"The numbers come down from
St. Louis, Ma'am. Trade or cash."

Her voice rose to a shout.
"Two dollars a pelt, Mister St. Louis. And my usual loan on 'baca, cartridges,
and flour. That's the way it's been for these thirty years, and that's the way
it'll be. Nothing more, nothing less."

The clerk shut the ledger
with a loud snap. "I'm afraid that's impossible."

"Well then, Mister St. Louis,
let an old mountain sage hen show you her possible bag."

Annie May waved her shotgun
at the clerk, then at a window, then at a row of pickle jars.

The terrified clerk backed
away, bumping into Zebulon who shoved him against a shelf of canned goods,
sending him and the cans crashing to the floor.

This was more like it,
Zebulon thought, looking around the room. This was what the old Spirit Doc
ordered when he needed to stir things up. He reached behind the counter for a
jug of liquor, uncorked it and took a long pull, then tossed it to Annie May,
who caught it in one hand. As the clerk staggered up from the floor, she
smashed the jug over his head.

"Hurrah fer mountain
doin's!" she shouted.

Hauling herself onto a
table, she fired her shotgun into the air. The pellets struck an overhead gas
lamp that exploded when it hit the floor, sending a rush of flames roaring
towards the ceiling.

"Hurrah fer mountain
doin's!" Zebulon shouted.

He yanked off a large gold
nugget that hung from a string around the clerk's neck.

"For settlement," he said.

Then he picked up an ax
handle and knocked over a shelf of air-tights and smashed a window as customers
grabbed whatever goods were close to hand and started for the door.

Zebulon found Annie May
slumped underneath the table, a bullet through her chest. As he gently gathered
her into his arms, a barrel of kerosene exploded behind them, collapsing the
ceiling, blowing out windows, killing two miners, and setting the building on
fire.

Zebulon carried Annie May
outside and laid her on the sagging wooden sidewalk. Around them, a line of men
were hand-rushing buckets of water to pour on the flames.

Annie
May's voice faded to a whisper. "Deer is deer… elk is elk and this mountain
oyster is a gone coon…. I done you wrong a time or two, son, as you did me… but that's family." She
raised herself up, trying to see him as her eyes clouded over. "Always figured
I'd go out the old way. Straight up and on my own breath…. But we caused a
commotion in this town, did we not, son?"

"So we did, Ma," he
answered.

"Did I ever tell how
Hatchet come to be with us?"

"You never did," he
replied, even though she had told him endless times.

"Pa won him from a Mex at a
rendezvous down on the Purgatory…. Everything was in the pot, everything the
Mex had – his traps, horses, pelts, and even little Hatchet as a throw in. No
more than a stump, he was. When Pa palmed the last card, he got caught, which
bothered him enough to carve the Mex up for callin' him out. Pa took Hatchet
back with him out of guilt, and maybe because he thought he could use another
hand. He was always one for slaves, your Pa…."

Her voice stopped and he
thought she was gone, until he heard her again.

"Are you with me, son?"

"I'm here, Ma."

"All right, then. Hatchet
was a weird boy. Always tryin' to drown you in the river. And then you tried to
do the same to him, just to get even…. When you find your Pa… tell him…. Hell,
don't tell him nothin'. He never did a damn thing for us except bring misery.
And now he's trotted off to the gold fields. The old cocksucker."

She looked up, her eyes
pleading with his not to ever let her go, and then she died.

He sat holding her as the
lines of water buckets were passed back and forth. When the fire was out, the
sheriff and the owner of the trading post, along with several clerks,
surrounded him with drawn pistols. One of the clerks carried a rope with a
noose tied at the end.

As Zebulon was pulled to
his feet, Hatchet Jack galloped through the crowd, pulling a saddled horse
behind him.

Shots were fired, but
before anyone could mount up to follow, Zebulon and Hatchet Jack had
disappeared down the street.

Ten miles outside of town
they parted company, Zebulon for old Mex, Hatchet Jack for California, where he
figured to make peace with Elijah.

 

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Kilindi Iyi: Mycologist, Traveler, Teacher
Learn about traveler and mycologist Kilindi Iyi known in the psychedelic community for his research and exploration of psilocybin.

How to Store Shrooms: Best Practices
How do you store shrooms for optimal shelf life? Learn how and why the proper storage method is so important.

Shroom Chocolate Recipes: How to Make Magic Mushroom Chocolates
This recipe provides step by step directions on how you can make mushroom chocolates with the necessary ingredients. Read to learn more!

Why Do People Use Psilocybin? New Johns Hopkins Study
Johns Hopkins University School of Medicines has just published a new study on psychoactive effects of psilocybin. Read here to learn more.

How-To Lemon Tek: Ultimate Guide and Recipe
This master guide will teach you how to lemon tek, preventing the onset of negative effects after consuming psilocybin. Read to learn more!

How to Intensify a Mushroom Trip
Learn about techniques like Lemon tekking, or discover the right time to consume cannabis if you are looking to intensify a mushroom trip.

How to Grow Magic Mushrooms: Step-by-Step
This step-by-step guide will show you how to grow magic mushrooms at home. Read this guide before trying it on your own.

How to Dry Magic Mushrooms: Best Practices
Read to learn more about specifics for the best practices on how to dry magic mushrooms after harvesting season.

How to Buy Psilocybin Spores
Interested in psilocybin mushrooms? We’ll walk you through all you need to know to obtain mushroom spores. Nosh on this delish How To guide.

Hippie Flipping: When Shrooms and Molly Meet
What is it, what does it feel like, and how long does it last? Explore the mechanics of hippie flipping and how to safely experiment.

Having Sex on Shrooms: Good or Bad Idea?
Is having sex on shrooms a good idea or an accident waiting to happen? Find out in our guide to sex on magic mushrooms.

Gold Cap Shrooms Guide: Spores, Effects, Identification
Read this guide to learn more about the different characteristics of gold cap mushrooms, and how they differ from other psilocybin species.

Guide to Cooking with Magic Mushrooms
From cookies to smoothies and sandwiches, we cover various methods of cooking with magic mushrooms for the ultimate snack.

2020 Election: The Decriminalize Psilocybin Movement
Are you curious if mushrooms will follow in marijuana’s footsteps? Read to learn about how the U.S. is moving to decriminalize psilocybin.

Oregon’s Initiative to Legalize Mushrooms | Initiative Petition 34
Oregon continues to push ahead with their initiative to legalize Psilocybin in 2020. The measure received its official title and now needs signatures.

Canada Approves Psilocybin Treatment for Terminally-Ill Cancer Patients
Canada’s Minister of Health, Patty Hajdu approved the use of psilocybin to help ease anxiety and depression of four terminal cancer patients.

Mapping the DMT Experience
With only firsthand experiences to share, how can we fully map the DMT experience? Let’s explore what we know about this powerful psychedelic.

Guide to Machine Elves and Other DMT Entities
This guide discusses machine elves, clockwork elves, and other common DMT entities that people experience during a DMT trip.

Is the DMT Experience a Hallucination? 
What if the DMT realm was the real world, and our everyday lives were merely a game we had chosen to play?

How to Store DMT
Not sure how to store DMT? Read this piece to learn the best practices and elements of advice to keep your stuff fresh.

What Does 5-MeO-DMT Show Us About Consciousness?
How does our brain differentiate between what’s real and what’s not? Read to learn what can 5-MeO-DMT show us about consciousness.

How to Smoke DMT: Processes Explained
There are many ways to smoke DMT and we’ve outlined some of the best processes to consider before embarking on your journey.

How to Ground After DMT
Knowing what to expect from a DMT comedown can help you integrate the experience to gain as much value as possible from your journey.

How To Get DMT
What kind of plants contain DMT? Are there other ways to access this psychedelic? Read on to learn more about how to get DMT.

How DMT is Made: Everything You Need to Know
Ever wonder how to make DMT? Read our guide to learn everything you need to know about the procedures of how DMT is made.

Having Sex on DMT: What You Need to Know
Have you ever wondered about sex on DMT? Learn how the God Molecule can influence your intimate experiences.

Does the Human Brain Make DMT? 
With scientific evidence showing us DMT in the brain, what can we conclude it is there for? Read on to learn more.

How to Use DMT Vape Pens
Read to learn all about DMT vape pens including: what to know when vaping, what to expect when purchasing a DMT cartridge, and vaping safely.

DMT Resources
This article is a comprehensive DMT resource providing extensive information from studies, books, documentaries, and more. Check it out!

Differentiating DMT and Near-Death Experiences
Some say there are similarities between a DMT trip and death. Read our guide on differentiating DMT and near-death experiences to find out.

DMT Research from 1956 to the Edge of Time
From a representative sample of a suitably psychedelic crowd, you’d be hard pressed to find someone who couldn’t tell you all about Albert Hofmann’s enchanted bicycle ride after swallowing what turned out to be a massive dose of LSD. Far fewer, however, could tell you much about the world’s first DMT trip.

The Ultimate Guide to DMT Pricing
Check out our ultimate guide on DMT pricing to learn what to expect when purchasing DMT for your first time.

DMT Milking | Reality Sandwich
Indigenous cultures have used 5-MeO-DMT for centuries. With the surge in demand for psychedelic toad milk, is DMT Milking harming the frogs?

Why Does DMT Pervade Nature?
With the presence of DMT in nature everywhere – including human brains – why does it continue to baffle science?

DMT Substance Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
Our ultimate guide to DMT has everything you want to know about this powerful psychedelic referred to as “the spirit molecule”.

DMT for Depression: Paving the Way for New Medicine
We’ve been waiting for an effective depression treatment. Studies show DMT for depression works even for treatment resistant patients.

Beating Addiction with DMT
Psychedelics have been studied for their help overcoming addiction. Read how DMT is helping addicts beat their substance abuse issues.

DMT Extraction: Behind the Scientific Process
Take a look at DMT extraction and the scientific process involved. Learn all you need to know including procedures and safety.

Microdosing DMT & Common Dosages Explained
Microdosing, though imperceivable, is showing to have many health benefits–here is everything you want to know about microdosing DMT.

DMT Art: A Look Behind Visionary Creations
An entire genre of artwork is inspired by psychedelic trips with DMT. Read to learn about the entities and visions behind DMT art.

Changa vs. DMT: What You Need to Know
While similar (changa contains DMT), each drug has its own unique effect and feeling. Let’s compare and contrast changa vs DMT.

5-MeO-DMT Guide: Effects, Benefits, Safety, and Legality
5-Meo-DMT comes from the Sonora Desert toad. Here is everything you want to know about 5-Meo-DMT and how it compares to 4-AcO-DMT.

4-AcO-DMT Guide: Benefits, Effects, Safety, and Legality
This guide tells you everything about 4 AcO DMT & 5 MeO DMT, that belong to the tryptamine class, and are similar but slightly different to DMT.

How Much Does LSD Cost? When shopping around for that magical psychedelic substance, there can be many uncertainties when new to buying LSD. You may be wondering how much does LSD cost? In this article, we will discuss what to expect when purchasing LSD on the black market, what forms LSD is sold in, and the standard breakdown of buying LSD in quantity.   Navy Use of LSD on the Dark Web The dark web is increasingly popular for purchasing illegal substances. The US Navy has now noticed this trend with their staff. Read to learn more.   Having Sex on LSD: What You Need to Know Can you have sex on LSD? Read our guide to learn everything about sex on acid, from lowered inhibitions to LSD users quotes on sex while tripping.   A Drug That Switches off an LSD Trip A pharmaceutical company is developing an “off-switch” drug for an LSD trip, in the case that a bad trip can happen. Some would say there is no such thing.   Queen of Hearts: An Interview with Liz Elliot on Tim Leary and LSD The history of psychedelia, particularly the British experience, has been almost totally written by men. Of the women involved, especially those who were in the thick of it, little has been written either by or about them. A notable exception is Liz Elliot.   LSD Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety LSD, Lysergic acid diethylamide, or just acid is one of the most important psychedelics ever discovered. What did history teach us?   Microdosing LSD & Common Dosage Explained Microdosing, though imperceivable, is showing to have many health benefits–here is everything you want to know about microdosing LSD.   LSD Resources Curious to learn more about LSD? This guide includes comprehensive LSD resources containing books, studies and more.   LSD as a Spiritual Aid There is common consent that the evolution of mankind is paralleled by the increase and expansion of consciousness. From the described process of how consciousness originates and develops, it becomes evident that its growth depends on its faculty of perception. Therefore every means of improving this faculty should be used.   Legendary LSD Blotter Art: A Hidden Craftsmanship Have you ever heard of LSD blotter art? Explore the trippy world of LSD art and some of the top artists of LSD blotter art.   LSD and Exercise: Does it Work? LSD and exercise? Learn why high-performing athletes are taking hits of LSD to improve their overall potential.   Jan Bastiaans Treated Holocaust Survivors with LSD Dutch psychiatrist, Jan Bastiaans administered LSD-assisted therapy to survivors of the Holocaust. A true war hero and pioneer of psychedelic-therapy.   LSD and Spiritual Awakening I give thanks for LSD, which provided the opening that led me to India in 1971 and brought me to Neem Karoli Baba, known as Maharajji. Maharajji is described by the Indians as a “knower of hearts.”   How LSD is Made: Everything You Need to Know Ever wonder how to make LSD? Read our guide to learn everything you need to know about the procedures of how LSD is made.   How to Store LSD: Best Practices Learn the best way to store LSD, including the proper temperature and conditions to maximize how long LSD lasts when stored.   Bicycle Day: The Discovery of LSD Every year on April 19th, psychonauts join forces to celebrate Bicycle Day. Learn about the famous day when Albert Hoffman first discovered the effects of LSD.   Cary Grant: A Hollywood Legend On LSD Cary Grant was a famous actor during the 1930’s-60’s But did you know Grant experimented with LSD? Read our guide to learn more.   Albert Hofmann: LSD — My Problem Child Learn about Albert Hofmann and his discovery of LSD, along with the story of Bicycle Day and why it marks a historic milestone.   Babies are High: What Does LSD Do To Your Brain What do LSD and babies have in common? Researchers at the Imperial College in London discover that an adult’s brain on LSD looks like a baby’s brain.   1P LSD: Effects, Benefits, Safety Explained 1P LSD is an analogue of LSD and homologue of ALD-25. Here is everything you want to know about 1P LSD and how it compares to LSD.   Francis Crick, DNA & LSD Type ‘Francis Crick LSD’ into Google, and the result will be 30,000 links. Many sites claim that Crick (one of the two men responsible for discovering the structure of DNA), was either under the influence of LSD at the time of his revelation or used the drug to help with his thought processes during his research. Is this true?   What Happens If You Overdose on LSD? A recent article presented three individuals who overdosed on LSD. Though the experience was unpleasant, the outcomes were remarkably positive.

The Ayahuasca Experience
Ayahuasca is both a medicine and a visionary aid. You can employ ayahuasca for physical, mental, emotional and spiritual repair, and you can engage with the power of ayahuasca for deeper insight and realization. If you consider attainment of knowledge in the broadest perspective, you can say that at all times, ayahuasca heals.

 

Trippy Talk: Meet Ayahuasca with Sitaramaya Sita and PlantTeachers
Sitaramaya Sita is a spiritual herbalist, pusangera, and plant wisdom practitioner formally trained in the Shipibo ayahuasca tradition.

 

The Therapeutic Value of Ayahuasca
My best description of the impact of ayahuasca is that it’s a rocket boost to psychospiritual growth and unfolding, my professional specialty during my thirty-five years of private practice.

 

Microdosing Ayahuasca: Common Dosage Explained
What is ayahuasca made of and what is considered a microdose? Explore insights with an experienced Peruvian brewmaster and learn more about this practice.

 

Ayahuasca Makes Neuron Babies in Your Brain
Researchers from Beckley/Sant Pau Research Program have shared the latest findings in their study on the effects of ayahuasca on neurogenesis.

 

The Fatimiya Sufi Order and Ayahuasca
In this interview, the founder of the Fatimiya Sufi Order,  N. Wahid Azal, discusses the history and uses of plant medicines in Islamic and pre-Islamic mystery schools.

 

Consideration Ayahuasca for Treatment of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Research indicates that ayahuasca mimics mechanisms of currently accepted treatments for PTSD. In order to understand the implications of ayahuasca treatment, we need to understand how PTSD develops.

 

Brainwaves on Ayahuasca: A Waking Dream State
In a study researchers shared discoveries showing ingredients found in Ayahuasca impact the brainwaves causing a “waking dream” state.

 

Cannabis and Ayahuasca: Mixing Entheogenic Plants
Cannabis and Ayahuasca: most people believe they shouldn’t be mixed. Read this personal experience peppered with thoughts from a pro cannabis Peruvian Shaman.

 

Ayahuasca Retreat 101: Everything You Need to Know to Brave the Brew
Ayahuasca has been known to be a powerful medicinal substance for millennia. However, until recently, it was only found in the jungle. Word of its deeply healing and cleansing properties has begun to spread across the world as many modern, Western individuals are seeking spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical well-being. More ayahuasca retreat centers are emerging in the Amazon and worldwide to meet the demand.

 

Ayahuasca Helps with Grief
A new study published in psychopharmacology found that ayahuasca helped those suffering from the loss of a loved one up to a year after treatment.

 

Ayahuasca Benefits: Clinical Improvements for Six Months
Ayahuasca benefits can last six months according to studies. Read here to learn about the clinical improvements from drinking the brew.

 

Ayahuasca Culture: Indigenous, Western, And The Future
Ayahuasca has been use for generations in the Amazon. With the rise of retreats and the brew leaving the rainforest how is ayahuasca culture changing?

 

Ayahuasca Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
The Amazonian brew, Ayahuasca has a long history and wide use. Read our guide to learn all about the tea from its beginnings up to modern-day interest.

 

Ayahuasca and the Godhead: An Interview with Wahid Azal of the Fatimiya Sufi Order
Wahid Azal, a Sufi mystic of The Fatimiya Sufi Order and an Islamic scholar, talks about entheogens, Sufism, mythology, and metaphysics.

 

Ayahuasca and the Feminine: Women’s Roles, Healing, Retreats, and More
Ayahuasca is lovingly called “grandmother” or “mother” by many. Just how feminine is the brew? Read to learn all about women and ayahuasca.

What Is the Standard of Care for Ketamine Treatments?
Ketamine therapy is on the rise in light of its powerful results for treatment-resistant depression. But, what is the current standard of care for ketamine? Read to find out.

What Is Dissociation and How Does Ketamine Create It?
Dissociation can take on multiple forms. So, what is dissociation like and how does ketamine create it? Read to find out.

Having Sex on Ketamine: Getting Physical on a Dissociative
Curious about what it could feel like to have sex on a dissociate? Find out all the answers in our guide to sex on ketamine.

Special K: The Party Drug
Special K refers to Ketamine when used recreationally. Learn the trends as well as safety information around this substance.

Kitty Flipping: When Ketamine and Molly Meet
What is it, what does it feel like, and how long does it last? Read to explore the mechanics of kitty flipping.

Ketamine vs. Esketamine: 3 Important Differences Explained
Ketamine and esketamine are used to treat depression. But what’s the difference between them? Read to learn which one is right for you: ketamine vs. esketamine.

Guide to Ketamine Treatments: Understanding the New Approach
Ketamine is becoming more popular as more people are seeing its benefits. Is ketamine a fit? Read our guide for all you need to know about ketamine treatments.

Ketamine Treatment for Eating Disorders
Ketamine is becoming a promising treatment for various mental health conditions. Read to learn how individuals can use ketamine treatment for eating disorders.

Ketamine Resources, Studies, and Trusted Information
Curious to learn more about ketamine? This guide includes comprehensive ketamine resources containing books, studies and more.

Ketamine Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
Our ultimate guide to ketamine has everything you need to know about this “dissociative anesthetic” and how it is being studied for depression treatment.

Ketamine for Depression: A Mental Health Breakthrough
While antidepressants work for some, many others find no relief. Read to learn about the therapeutic uses of ketamine for depression.

Ketamine for Addiction: Treatments Offering Hope
New treatments are offering hope to individuals suffering from addiction diseases. Read to learn how ketamine for addiction is providing breakthrough results.

Microdosing Ketamine & Common Dosages Explained
Microdosing, though imperceivable, is showing to have many health benefits–here is everything you want to know about microdosing ketamine.

How to Ease a Ketamine Comedown
Knowing what to expect when you come down from ketamine can help integrate the experience to gain as much value as possible.

How to Store Ketamine: Best Practices
Learn the best ways how to store ketamine, including the proper temperature and conditions to maximize how long ketamine lasts when stored.

How To Buy Ketamine: Is There Legal Ketamine Online?
Learn exactly where it’s legal to buy ketamine, and if it’s possible to purchase legal ketamine on the internet.

How Long Does Ketamine Stay in Your System?
How long does ketamine stay in your system? Are there lasting effects on your body? Read to discover the answers!

How Ketamine is Made: Everything You Need to Know
Ever wonder how to make Ketamine? Read our guide to learn everything you need to know about the procedures of how Ketamine is made.

Colorado on Ketamine: First Responders Waiver Programs
Fallout continues after Elijah McClain. Despite opposing recommendations from some city council, Colorado State Health panel recommends the continued use of ketamine by medics for those demonstrating “excited delirium” or “extreme agitation”.

Types of Ketamine: Learn the Differences & Uses for Each
Learn about the different types of ketamine and what they are used for—and what type might be right for you. Read now to find out!

Kitty Flipping: When Ketamine and Molly Meet
What is it, what does it feel like, and how long does it last? Read to explore the mechanics of kitty flipping.

MDMA & Ecstasy Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
Our ultimate guide to MDMA has everything you want to know about Ecstasy from how it was developed in 1912 to why it’s being studied today.

How To Get the Most out of Taking MDMA as a Couple
Taking MDMA as a couple can lead to exciting experiences. Read here to learn how to get the most of of this love drug in your relationship.

Common MDMA Dosage & Microdosing Explained
Microdosing, though imperceivable, is showing to have many health benefits–here is everything you want to know about microdosing MDMA.

Having Sex on MDMA: What You Need to Know
MDMA is known as the love drug… Read our guide to learn all about sex on MDMA and why it is beginning to makes its way into couple’s therapy.

How MDMA is Made: Common Procedures Explained
Ever wonder how to make MDMA? Read our guide to learn everything you need to know about the procedures of how MDMA is made.

Hippie Flipping: When Shrooms and Molly Meet
What is it, what does it feel like, and how long does it last? Explore the mechanics of hippie flipping and how to safely experiment.

How Cocaine is Made: Common Procedures Explained
Ever wonder how to make cocaine? Read our guide to learn everything you need to know about the procedures of how cocaine is made.

A Christmas Sweater with Santa and Cocaine
This week, Walmart came under fire for a “Let it Snow” Christmas sweater depicting Santa with lines of cocaine. Columbia is not merry about it.

Ultimate Cocaine Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
This guide covers what you need to know about Cocaine, including common effects and uses, legality, safety precautions and top trends today.

NEWS: An FDA-Approved Cocaine Nasal Spray
The FDA approved a cocaine nasal spray called Numbrino, which has raised suspicions that the pharmaceutical company, Lannett Company Inc., paid off the FDA..

The Ultimate Guide to Cannabis Bioavailability
What is bioavailability and how can it affect the overall efficacy of a psychedelic substance? Read to learn more.

Cannabis Research Explains Sociability Behaviors
New research by Dr. Giovanni Marsicano shows social behavioral changes occur as a result of less energy available to the neurons. Read here to learn more.

The Cannabis Shaman
If recreational and medical use of marijuana is becoming accepted, can the spiritual use as well? Experiential journalist Rak Razam interviews Hamilton Souther, founder of the 420 Cannabis Shamanism movement…

Cannabis Guide: Effects, Common Uses, Safety
Our ultimate guide to Cannabis has everything you want to know about this popular substances that has psychedelic properties.

Cannabis and Ayahuasca: Mixing Entheogenic Plants
Cannabis and Ayahuasca: most people believe they shouldn’t be mixed. Read this personal experience peppered with thoughts from a procannabis Peruvian Shaman.

CBD-Rich Cannabis Versus Single-Molecule CBD
A ground-breaking study has documented the superior therapeutic properties of whole plant Cannabis extract as compared to synthetic cannabidiol (CBD), challenging the medical-industrial complex’s notion that “crude” botanical preparations are less effective than single-molecule compounds.

Cannabis Has Always Been a Medicine
Modern science has already confirmed the efficacy of cannabis for most uses described in the ancient medical texts, but prohibitionists still claim that medical cannabis is “just a ruse.”

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